Blu-ray Review: Howling III (1987)
Anthropologist Harry Beckmeyer (Barry Otto) witnesses some old-ass footage that purportedly shows a werewolf, and hears of a lycanthrope on the prowl in Siberia, so does what any rational human being would do; contacts the President of the United States and warns him of a worldwide werewolf epidemic. Spoiler: Prez blows that shit off. Wonder why? Meanwhile, comely marsupial werewolf Jerboa (Imogen Annesley) has fled from her abusive home and has been discovered living on the streets by Donny Martin (Leigh Biolos) who gets her a gig starring in the fright flick ‘Shape Shifters Part 8′. Jerboa reveals she is a real life werewolf, but Donny being the typical red-blooded male fucks her anyway…I mean, it’s only half bestiality, so it’s all good, right bro? (shudder) Soon Jerboa’s estranged family come a-lookin’ for her, and Beckmeyer crosses their path…and falls in love with a werewolf ballerina…and then ancient phantom werewolves are summoned…and there’s an award show…and a baby werewolf…and…and…ME FUCKIN’
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